One of the strategies to avoid at looking at our old unpleasant feelings is: being too busy.

I can relate to that because I practiced BEING TOO BUSY for many years I was so active in so many projects that a close friend named me ” the one on the run”. It shows you how driven I was, driven by false needs and memorized emotions from the past. For some of you readers, it might be different areas you being too busy: maybe running too often to a member of your extended family to help out or staying too many hours at your work or business.

Staying busy keeps us from facing our unpleasant side.

We all have become jaded in our time of upbringin and our denial of those wounds and unpleasant feelings is inflicting the sense of being stuck in our Life.

Also, I noticed that this busyness feeds the addiction of our false outer identity. For example, to feel important, .to have a sense of acknowledgment, to appear like a caring person.

Of course, from all these activities many good things come from,

Yet,  as Grandmother PaRisHa often pointed out, we simply live in denial.

“A Change is gonna come”

Then there comes a time where we cannot anymore run nor distract ourselves from the jaded parts of our Being.

While I worked in the field of sexual abuse, I learned that mostly adults in the age of 30, 40 or 50 start remembering, that something bad had happened in their childhood or youth.

Finally, we are strong enough as a person, to face this and other traumatic experiences

It is also an age where we notice a repetition of failures in relationships, in our career, in starting a business and other areas of our Life. We finally have to accept, that we cannot blame anymore others for this. There seems to be a pattern. Somehow it has to do with who we are.

For many, the wake-up calls are now louder and come more often. maybe in crisis in relationships, or with financial crisis, or breakdowns in our health. So now, we start feeling uncertain and vulnerable, the mid Life crisis has hit. We also notice that staying busy or playing with our toys (like fast cars, big vacations) is to wearing out. Those strategies of denial are not anymore distracting us from starting to look, confront and come-front with the unpleasant parts of our selves: the guilt or anger, or shame, or self-doubt and more.

We still might fall into the instant gratification of social media and TV.

However, we know deep inside we have to face it: Who am I really?

We could first ask ourselves, what strategies am I using for that thrill, that jolted experience and most of all for avoiding to be honest with myself

And finally we look deeper and understand that there is always some emotional baggage we can let go off.

Each time we do, we have more energy freed up.

Then we can create and become the authentic free Self, who lives its true Life purpose.

co-host Rosemarie Heyer