In the Courage to be disliked, Ichiro Kishimi shares interesting perspective on the role of trauma in people’s current conditions. Most of us think that a person is experiencing restrictions and limitations in life because of past trauma. Trauma being events that have left an imprint. I believe that in painful emotional events we make decisions about ourselves, others, and the world around us. Those decisions then inform our next actions and choices and can be a self-perpetuating cycle that continues to validate our negative beliefs. In Adlerian psychology, it is thought that a person in only every acting in this moment with a current goal. This is referred to as teleology. And in Freudian psychology, the perspective is that one is experiencing their current emotional state and conditions due to a past painful event.
Kishimi gets up thinking about the current goal in any of our thoughts, feelings, and actions, regardless of our past. This makes sense to me, as I have counselled with hundreds of different people over the years, who all experienced trauma and yet they are all very different in the symptoms they are experiencing. Kishimi shares that if it were only about aetiology, as in past events cause the current response , then all these people would be experiencing the same or similar symptoms. This is certainly not the case, some people feel they cant work, others focus only on working. Some cant leave the house and others never settle in a home.
Teleology is an interesting perspective to self-inquire. So hypothetically, If I am angry and yelling at my neighbour – what is my current goal?. One could justify that it is the neighbour’s fault because they play load music until 4 in the morning and eventually getting fed up and yelling may be a natural response. Alfred Adler would say, I had the goal of yelling because that is the way I wanted to communicate. Perhaps I thought it is the way I would get heard best. Perhaps my negotiation skills are not well developed. So in order to justify yelling, I became angry. My current goal would be to forcefully get my point across and get my way through intimidation and power. If my current goal was amicable relationship, clear respectful communication and maintaining my own integrity, then I may have chosen words, tone, and volume. As a result, I would be experiencing different emotions.
Some would say, what if you experienced severe trauma. It is not your fault that you act the way you do, perhaps you don’t know any better. Regardless of the past, Adlerian psychology would still point to the current goal. Perhaps to keep people way for certain gains, perhaps to avoid any experience.
What I am still grappling with in this theory is, what is the role of underlying negative beliefs. These little seeds of negativity that underly many of the choices we may make moment to moment. One thing I like about Adlerian psychology is that it brings situations into the current moment. It is in the here and now we can change that is not working for us. So by looking at what my current goal is, then I can examine if that is working for me to be in alignment with my greater intentions. If it isn’t, I can make a new choice. Simply blaming the past for our current situations takes away the power of choice and change.
Marianne Love